As I tap my way into the blogosphere for the very first time, there’s an important woman front of mind.
Her name is Lorna Millar.
Lorna and I were firm friends. It didn’t matter that she was fifty years older than me, the age gap was no boundary to a terrific relationship and I’d often pop across to her house as a little girl.
Along with my beautiful mum, Lorna shaped my belief that women of all ages have wisdom to share. Gems of advice which give us wings when life hurts; as it so often does.
Engaging Women is influenced by many good women.
Here’s a tribute to my friend.
My sweet, wise neighbour
It was summer in the early 1980’s. Olivia Newton John’s Xanadu made young girls believe in magic and my white boot roller skates had once again come to a stop at our lovely neighbour Lorna Millar’s house.
“Oh hello Martine! Why don’t you come in for some cake love, I’ve got a new book to show you.”
Our friendship formed quickly, despite the fifty year age gap; or maybe because of it.
Although in grade three, my mind would be transported to an English village by the blue and white ceramics in the kitchen, her old piano, occasional eccentricity and her books.
The books!
Wordsworth, Shakespeare and Keller jostled for shelf space with Louise Hay. She had almost always leafed through a particular book and marked some little gem with a dried flower.
This type of thing:
“The soul would have no rainbow, had the eyes no tears.”
As a woman I try to unpack what made her such a delicious character to a little girl, teenager and now a mum of my own trifecta.
Why do I think of her so often?
Because she was imparting her wisdom. By focussing on the goodness in people, the beauty in life, I revelled in her world.
In her 70’s she was still chatting with authority about the latest art house movies, was interested in world affairs, feminism and had gutsy opinions.
Lorna possessed the optimism of someone who had found a great love to share most of her life with and the empathy of someone who has lost.
The picture of her beautiful little girl with big brown eyes – the daughter who died many years before we met from a devastating illness – remains clear in my mind. Decades later, she was dealt another blow when her beloved husband Vic passed away. Still, she is lit from within by the love of her family, nature and what tomorrow will bring.
One of the reasons I started this blog is because I feel there’s so much younger women can learn from our wiser, everyday sisters. I don’t mean the usual media suspects; I mean the everyday sisters.
Lorna politely declined a formal interview – the digital age doesn’t hold much interest for this elegant creature.
Still I really wanted to write something to honour my friend.
I’m so grateful for her indulgence.
Martine & Lorna, 2005
Lorna, looking beautifully groomed as always, attended my wedding to Mr Harte 8 years ago.
Thank goodness for the wisdom of older women, let’s celebrate them.